My Letter to Deepika Padukone on her Birthday.

Hi Deepika,

Happy BirthDay, May god bless you for everything you wanted in life.

Here is a small gift from me, in terms of words(thought), hope you’ll find it useful.

First of all, thank you very much, for such a nobel work, Live Love Laugh and spreading awareness on depression.

Thank you for your concern, being open and sharing your  experiences and thought in front of the world, and we could see your intensions, helping others in this situation in life.

You conveyed a message, Depression must be treated with the help of psychiatrists and/or counsellors. I watched the TV session out of curiosity, because that’s what I discussed hugely in my book “Love X Marry Y” (publishing soon).

But, Deepika, you somehow refrained from mentioning the reason why you suffered depression? You only said that, you had no clue ,what went wrong and when, you got up one morning and felt directionless, some days, you felt like not getting up even.

This gives rise to two lines of thought. Maybe you don’t want to divulge too much information in public as it can be counterproductive to your stardom. Or you’re really confused and have no idea about the root cause of your problem. Though I wonder how your doctors helped you without knowing the cause. Or maybe you haven’t yet come out of depression completely. I don’t want to get into that. You must be knowing it better than anyone else.

Why I’m saying this, because doctor says, Depression is a disease and it can’t be cured, but only can be controlled upto a good extent. Yes the stories, examples and researches are well included in my book Love X Marry Y.

That’s even true, these good doctors are not lying at all. No doctor can cure depression. it’s only you, who can do this.

 

The route cause

Every problem has a root cause. But how many doctors actually bother to find it? I would say very few. At times, it may even be difficult for doctors to diagnose the root cause. Maybe this isn’t their job. Sometimes, the patients reach them in such a state that immediate medication becomes a necessity.

Maybe it’s your responsibility to convey the root cause. But then you do not have any idea about this. Even if you tell the doctors that the cause is related to your life, I wonder how the doctor can really help.

Finding the root cause is the only way to cure depression. Mind you, I said ‘cure’ and not ‘control.’ That’s how it should be. The best treatment for depression lies in finding the root cause and working on it. But how do we establish the root cause? Where do we start from? It can be quite confusing and messy. Sometimes it appears as though there is no real reason. Well, that’s fairly understandable.

So, Deepika, only you know the truth, whether you consciously controlled your depression with the help of the psychiatrists and counsellors or you have completely come out of it ?

If you think your relationship is the reason, then you are missing the picture. You do not understand the root cause of depression. And also your mother have categorically said that relationship issues are not the reason for your depression. And you confessed that you’re not able to identify the reason. Now you know the truth, but I’m sure it was not a publicity stunt.

You have millions of fans, back-to-back super hit films and several big banner movies to choose from, besides many brand endorsements. Everything seems just perfect for you. But still you have been a victim of acute depression. Why? Why would such a thing happen? How can you so successful be depressed? If fame and fortune do not guarantee happiness, then what will?

The reason?

  • May be you’re not able to define your success till now. What does success mean to you? May be you need to re-define it? Here, I wildly discussed the issue in my book, how people finding it so hard to defining their success and how defining it guarantees a lifelong happiness and helps choosing a right career. I love my quote “Success has no definition, you have to write your own”.
  • Maybe you need more than that. You strive for satisfaction that fulfils all your desires.
  • Maybe something was or is still missing from your life. Somewhere down the line, you have not been able to find your inner voice and have not been able to live your desire. What does you really care for?
  • Maybe you have become a robot controlled by circumstances and people around you.
  • You may be everything in people’s eyes, but nothing in your own.
  • Maybe your status is no more working out for you.
  • Maybe it’s a suffocating tag. Maybe you want to come out of it, but fears losing a lot.

 

Here are few suggestions, that may helps re-defining.

  • You’re more human and fewer star, your inner smile has much more value than the smile your fans need.
  • Find the real you, what you deeply care and respect. Your values and beliefs, rather, what people around you thinks and wants you to do or become. You’re extremely talented with what you do, but may be you need to align your work accordingly.
  • Set time and prioritize things, may be you have do 1-2 films in a year, so that, you get enough time for your dreams and desires, things that you really care.
  • Declare, your schedule and type of work in the industry, so that you don’t have to waste time and energy evaluating things frequently, that has no/less value for you.
  • Don’t worry about the stardom, it comes and goes with time, but what doesn’t is your happiness.
  • You have done much of what you do, perhaps it’s time to think about your unfulfilled desires, your long term happiness. Please think about them and value them as well.
  • When you make your new year’s resolutions, writing down the goal that’s more important than films.

I have recently discussed TOP 5 REASONS, that’s holding back our success, and how we can manage them, making 2016, the best year ever.

I’m extremely sorry, If I hurt you any where in this, that’s never been an intention.

Once again, many many returns of the day, God bless you for all the happiness you desired.

With Love,

Avinash